State executive member, Suman Sharma is a Jaipur based socio-political leader who deals with cases related to women-violence on a daily basis. In spite of her busy schedule, she happily invited us to her home in the middle of the day. Below is the inspiring story of Suman, not as the member of BJP and a public speaker, but as a substantial woman who has devoted her life to the betterment of women.

Introduction

I had always been active in school debates, although I was never involved in direct leadership. I didn’t know much about politics until I got married. My in-laws’ family loves discussing politics over the dinner, and it’s from there that I picked up the interest.

It was when I was 25 yrs old; I joined the Ram Janam Bhumi Andolan during 1987-88. After that, I became regular with few ground-level works to polish myself and gain information about the field.

After some time, I was elected as the Adhyaksh (head) of the Women’s Wing. Little did I realize I could perform well and capitalize my capability! I was chosen the State President of Maheela Morcha for three years, twice.

Early days as a naïve politician

Those days were tough. I have heard people saying things like – ‘She is too young to handle politics’ to ‘She is so attractive for politics.’ I have heard phrases demeaning my abilities and womanhood. I remember going to my husband and crying about what was happening each such day. He was my pillar of strength every single time and still is.

Early days of motherhood

I was just 26 when I entered politics. My son was few months old and I remember carrying him everywhere from offices to village locations. Other times, I used to come back home during breaks to breastfeed him. My only regret is that I couldn’t give him quality time. I wanted to spend my time talking and listening to my son. That I call a loophole.

Moreover, I took the issue of India’s increasing population a bit too seriously and decided to take it in my hands. (laughs) And so, I didn’t plan the second child! I now think I should have, at least, he would have got some company.

Early days of managing work and home simultaneously

I got married into a joint family and was the only new bahu. As much as I was needed to be in my office which I joined just after a year of my marriage, I was expected to be a part of the family affairs too. I didn’t leave any stone unturned not to make anyone feel my absence during important hours. I would get up early to prepare breakfast and lunch. Dinner was managed once I would get back home in the evening. My in-laws are good and never complained about not being served hot chapattis.

Sometimes I would develop a guilt factor for ‘not being there all the time’, but I never let that hamper my energy throughout the day.

Experience at work

27 years is a long tenure to teach you quality lessons. I have learnt mine with time. Since I was always enthusiastic to know more about the assigned work, I was able to grab quality knowledge.

My base may be political, but my work is social. Our team is not just the counselor for women; at times, we have to act as police and lawyer too to safeguard them. Being patient, humble and wise are the foremost qualities one develops over the years working on such issues.

Contributions to society

I, along with my team, have been working for the betterment of the women from kacchi basti. Their economic roots are weak and issues like – girl education, dowry, and harassment – are handled by us. The problem with these women is that they aren’t well-acquainted with the laws favoring them. That’s where our role starts by educating them.

Women empowerment

Women are empowered. Who say men over-shadow us and that we are dependent on them? Poor men, they can’t even wash their underwear. THEY are dependent on us! (laughs)

Achievements

The sodium lights across the footpath, plants on dividers and parks inside the colony’s localities are few of them. I was inspired by the sodium lights across the marine drive in Mumbai and wanted to inculcate this idea in my city as well. To get the budget for planting on dividers, we asked companies to put their ads. For example – Nokia put its ad; and we wrote a message under it: Green city. Clean city.

Inspiration

Sita, Draupadi are my inspirations. We say that era was not modern or open-minded. Sita had a swayambar (a public event where eligible bachelors are invited, and the bride selects one suiting her interests the best). Draupadi was married to 5 men, and she carried all the relations so well. What would you call that?

Message for our readers

There are few personal things I want to share with you:

1. I have learnt that women need to be emotionally, economically and physically very strong – in the same order.
2. Culturally, we are very rich, but we are still not liberal in the true sense.
3. Our minds should be bold, not just clothes. A house has a pattern – drawing room, bedroom, kitchen, toilets, etc. We don’t do everything in one room. However these days, women are eager to bring the bedroom into the drawing room, that is, wearing clothes meant for bedroom outside. When in Rome, do as the Romans do. I don’t oppose the western clothes, but I insist on wearing them at the right place. The point is, not to become a rebel unnecessarily, saying it’s ‘my choice’.
4. Fight child marriage, not marriage. How will you experience the best part of a woman’s life – motherhood – without marrying?

Some of you might not agree with her way of thinking, but somewhere it seems like the ‘3^rd corridor’ breaking the ongoing confusion between ‘right and wrong’.